Actress, comedian, and filmmaker Anna Akana is a vocal advocate for mental health awareness and suicide prevention—she’s lived with clinical depression and anxiety for 10 years herself. For ELLE.com, Anna lists the least helpful unsolicited advice she gets about mental illness—from whether her diet might be to blame, to whether she’s all better because she doesn’t “seem” depressed. She also makes some suggestions for what to say to someone struggling with depression because—hey, here’s some helpful advice—you’re doing it wrong.